1 Peter 5:14 Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to you all who are in Christ Jesus. Amen.
Me and Pastor Paul. We’re in Israel, the 70th anniversary of their statehood, and I reaffirmed my baptism in the Jordan River. April 2018
Backstory – When we purchased our home in Worley, Idaho, with 32 acres, I had asked for a greenhouse, but Mike had a zillion reasons why it probably wouldn’t work for me. I told him I thought it would work great, but he resisted mightily. After 5 years, we sold that house and purchased a home in town. This home has just under 2 acres, and again, I started talking about having a greenhouse. Mike argued that I didn’t need one. I argued I did. I have had greenhouses in most of the places we’ve lived over the last 45 years – the past 6 years I’ve not had one and he’s been resistant. I talked to 3 different landscapers about redoing the yard, and adding a greenhouse was one of the major topics of discussion. Mike finally told me he thought the west side of the house would be best, I wanted the east side, but I decided not to argue on that. So, I began looking for a greenhouse that would serve my purposes and be substantial. Then, this last year, dealing with Mike, the dementia, getting things lined up and being able to have some ‘me’ time, I put the idea on the back burner of things to get accomplished. In October 2020, when I took my car in to have the winter tires put on, the clerk told me I would need new tires for summer. I had no idea how much it would cost for new tires, so I started putting away $200 a month from October until May. The new tires cost $700, and that left me with $900 and immediately I realized I was going to be getting a greenhouse! 🙂 So I purchased one!
Today: 19 June 2021
Mike got up at 9, but went to sleep on the sofa until noon. Then he wandered downstairs and was back upstairs within 15 minutes. He went out the front door and after a few minutes, I thought I’d better go see where he was, just to be sure he hadn’t fallen. Just about then, he came into the house very angry! “Robert told me he was getting you a greenhouse! You didn’t discuss this with me!! You didn’t get permission to purchase this! You overstepped here!” I told him I had discussed it with him, and he had agreed and I don’t need permission. Then he yelled, “Where did the money come from? How much did it cost? Where do you think you’re going to put it? How big is it?” I reminded him about getting the new tires, and that I had saved the difference, I told him the cost, and then I told him the size and where it will be placed in the back yard near my garden bed. He stormed out of the room and went downstairs, to the family room.
He found a couple of other things to get upset with me about, and one of them was space in the shop. I told him I was supposed to get one section of the shop for me, and he blew up again. He said, “Fine! Let’s start dividing everything up. We can just go our separate ways – are we going to divide the house also?” (sigh) He went on a bit longer and I just let him rant. Then I asked him why splitting up has become his ‘go to’ statement every time I mention my space area in the shop. He didn’t respond, he went to the family room. I think the next time he says something like that I will let him know he would end up in assisted living if I weren’t with him. He’s not capable of taking care of himself, anymore. He’s not allowed to handle his own medications, he’s not allowed to drive, use the ride mower, use power tools, and I keep the gas turn off for the kitchen stove so he won’t burn the place down. (He doesn’t know about that)
It was a frustrating day with Mike today, it seemed like several things upset him and, from my perspective, the day was in turmoil. I am exhausted dealing with him today!